Model employee

It's hard for me to believe what I'm about to write so I wanted to write it as proof it actually happened.
It is 4:38 p.m. and every other person in the newsroom left the office by 2:45 p.m. (including my boss), but I am still here. Nearly 2 hours later. Damn I'm a good little worker. Granted, this isn't really me working, but work was done while I sat here all by myself.

Where did they all go, you ask? Was I left behind as some sort of punishment?
They're golfing at the annual editorial tournament, which I participated in last year and decided golfing wasn't really my thang unless it was the mini variety.

Seriously, what am I still doing here?