What's in my head

This is the home of your average girl in her early 30s making her way in the big city...Not really. I have thoughts. Now I have somewhere to put them.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

My wildlife encounter

So I pull up to work Thursday morning, late as usual. Before turning off the car I notice something. Something I've never seen before. There is a raccoon under the back stairs. Between me and the door is a wild animal with little claws and teeth. "What do I do?" I think in a panic. I'm not going out there. I honk the horn. Nothing. I call a friend hoping she'll have some raccoon wisdom to share. It goes to voicemail. "Crap!" Before making my next move I remember I have my camera with me and take a few photos to document this experience. (I know it's kinda blurry, I was far away...)

Then I honk again. Nothing. It just looks scared and goes further into it's lair. I start the car, back up and drive towards it, horn going (don't worry, I wasn't actually going to run it over!) Nothing. I call my friend again and this time leave a cryptic message. I call a former colleague who will 1) thoroughly enjoy my predicament and 2) possibly have some advice. More voicemail. I call a colleague, she doesn't answer. I've been trapped in my car a good five minutes now, afraid of the beast under the stairs.

I think of who else is available during the day. I call Carly and she becomes my saviour. I explain the situation and she reasons, "maybe the honking and the driving at it scared it into not moving." Yes, that makes sense. "Throw something at it," she adds. Oooo, I think this idea. I have a messy car, I'm bound to have objects I can throw at it. I pick up a water bottle and get ready to aim, but stop, thinking it might not go very far or be very scary. I wedge into the backseat and open the hatch - as I refuse to leave the safety of my vehicle. I have roller blades! And old shoes! I take a shoe in one hand (a roller blades wouldn't go very far and if it made contact it might hurt the little beast) and the water bottle in the other. I step out of the car - making sure to leave the door open for easy access incase it attacks - and throw the shoe. I miss, but it scampers away. I grab my stuff and make it safely inside.

I spend the rest of the day afraid to go outside in the event I angered the raccoon and it didn't really leave, but rather just went to get friends to mess me up.


  • At 9:18 PM , Blogger Vicki said...

    I think that was how most of the Bugs Bunny cartoons started....

    You realize, of course, that this means raccoon war.

    Prepare for exploding telegrams and falling anvils. Such is the wrath of the almighty raccoon.


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